Americans Amuck

Mysteries of Britain, Part I

2009-01-25T16:43:00.003Z

Even though I've lived in MOE for more than 3 years now, there are still some things about the culture I just don't understand. I encountered one today: It's raining out, and no one has an umbrella. Some people (mostly old men trying to cover their bald patches) were wearing hats, one or two had hoodies up, but no one I saw had a brolly.

Why? Do people here like getting wet? Are they genetically altered to have skin and hair on which the raindrops bead? Mr. W says it's about "toughness." Brits are tougher than we Yanks are. I say they're just wetter than we are. Anyone care to enlighten me on when it's appropriate to use protection when it's raining out?

Thanks in advance,
Ignorant in Islington

More Things I Like, Things I Don't Like

2009-01-19T13:30:00.002Z

Things I like: Trains.

These past two weekends, I've ridden my bicycle to Cambridge and ridden a train back, and taken a train to Stevenage for a running race and come back. In both cases, my wait for a train was minimal and travel time was tolerable. Train service is frequent and more often reliable than unreliable. You can get to more than 2,500 destinations by train. Now if you ask a Briton, it's gone downhill since Margaret Thatcher reorganized it. And having been on Swiss trains recently, I can say that they appear to make more allowances for bicycles than British trains do. But still, the rail service makes car ownership optional for a larger share of the population than the United States.

Things I don't like: Northern accents.

I shouldn't make fun of the way people talk, but there is something in the northern English accent that rubs me wrong. I love a broad Scottish brogue and a Welsh lilt, but strong Yorkshire and Liverpudlian accents are at times almost incomprehensible to me. The TV serial Hollyoaks best exemplifies the accents I hate. See if you don't want to punch your computer screen when you click through to this Hollyoaks clip for which embedding has been disabled.

Things I Like; Things I Don't Like

2009-01-12T10:34:00.004Z

The stamp on my UK visa tells me I entered this country on a permanent basis Jan. 21, 2006. Three years (or thereabouts) gives me some perspective on life here. It's not long enough to be cynical ... OK, it's long enough to be cynical about some aspects of life here ... but long enough to have developed some clear likes and dislikes. Or at least things we enjoy and things we find peculiar. So to celebrate the three-year anniversary, I thought I'd do a series of posts on things I really like and things I really don't like (Mrs. Werbenmanjensen is free to join in as she wishes).

A thing I like:

Beer.

It is fortunate that I live in a land with so many good beers. It is unfortunate that I am unable to try each and every one of them. So my advice to those who ask me what they ought to drink when visiting Britain is to tell them to walk into the nearest pub, look for the long handles on the bar and order what looks interesting from the selection of badges on those handles. Those are the cask ales, pumped by hand from a cellar to your pint glass. While over time they may have gone from being made by specialist brewers to being a brand owned by a major conglomerate, they are beers you won't get in any other country--bitters, porters and the like. Across the rest of the bar you may see familiar names--Guinness, Kronenbourg, Carling, even Budweiser and Coors. But you can get those at any old bar. I like to try something I haven't drunk before.

A thing I don't like:

The obsession with the carbon cost of heating a kettle of water for tea.

This is a comparison you'll find in many contexts. This morning, the BBC reported that two Google searches consume the same amount of energy as boiling a kettle of water (never mind the auto trips to the library averted by Google searching). A major train operator advertises that its trains are so energy efficient that they actually make up for millions of boiling kettles (the first of four on this clip):

Look, almost every action causes carbon dioxide to be released into the atmosphere. If we're going to drink tea, it will require energy, and until our energy sources are 100% sustainable, that energy consumption will result in carbon emissions--no matter if we heat our water in kettle, on a stove, or in an animal skin over a wood fire. If you don't want your beverage to have a carbon impact, drink water. From a stream.

This obsession wouldn't be so bad if it weren't trivial in comparison to some of the choices we make in our lifestyle, living accommodations, residence, commute, and leisure travel that release far more than the 14 grams of carbon that a kettle does. But we don't like the thought of giving up our houses, yards, automobiles, and sunny holidays, so we obsess about tea kettles.

Death Of An English Folk Tradition

2009-01-06T07:33:00.003Z

Without comment, I'll note this following article about the feared demise of Morris Dancing:

The numbers of people participating in the traditional British folk dance are dwindling whilst the age of the dancers is increasing, according to the Morris Ring, an association representing over 200 Morris troupes across Britain.
It is warning that "unless younger blood is recruited during the coming winter months, Morris dancing will soon become extinct".
Charlie Corcoran, Bagman of the Morris Ring, said: "There's a distinct possibility that in 20 years' time there will be nobody left.
"It worries me a great deal. Young people are just too embarrassed to take part.

Embarassing? I'll let the reader be the judge:

Merry Christmas From Your Local Pub

2008-12-25T10:57:00.001Z

Which, you will note, is open noon to 3 p.m.

-- Post From My iPhone

Tuesday Catblogging

2008-12-23T08:15:00.002Z

Greg and me. (Apologies for the quality: It's a photo of a photo.)

Well, there's some bad news on the catblogging front. Greg has departed. Not this plane of existence, but he's gone to live with our pastoral assistant, who was his chief caretaker. A lot of turnover in the parish--several longtime priests have moved on to another parish the order runs Kent--meant that Greg was feeling a little out of sorts. His new home is a little more rural, perfect for a maturing cat like Greg. I was chatting with the pastoral assistant about his new life. She said he'd mastered the catdoor to go outside, but was having a little trouble figuring out how to get back in through the same door. To teach him how to do it, she said she'd gone out another door, then "posted" him--as a postman might--through his catdoor.

London, 8:26 a.m.

2008-12-22T08:28:00.001Z

Somewhere over there is the sun.
-- Post From My iPhone

London, 8:12 a.m.

2008-12-19T08:13:00.001Z

Looks like we'll see some sun today.

-- Post From My iPhone

The PSA Tales

2008-12-17T10:47:00.001Z

I might have mentioned in the past that public service advertisements are a bit different here, with a tendency to scare instead of persuade. Here are a couple more examples:

Dear Hollywood,

My film-going habits have changed in recent years not because I'm downloading pirated movies, but because I've grown weary of your constant recycling of superhero movies and remakes. I could tolerate this advert if it were simply on my television--that's what mute buttons are for. However, that I'm forced to sit through this advert in a cinema after I've paid £8 to get in is well beyond insulting. Knock it off.

Dear Department for Work and Pensions,

I doubt even 1 percent of this advert's viewers are benefit thieves. I would applaud your vigilance if I didn't know that this ad was instead aimed at me, the taxpayer, to try to persuade me that you're doing a good job at cracking down on benefit fraud. However, what this ad reveals to me is that the scale of the benefit fraud and the efforts to eliminate it are about equal. Not a good use of resources.

(This one is rather unpleasant.)

Dear Think! ad campaign,

This ad is just disgusting. You know what having this ad thrust in front of me during a quiet night's TV watching is like? Imagine me coming into your house at dinner time, and spitting on your plate. Yeah, it's like that. Please take it off.

Dear Countryside Access,
This one is still enjoyable after all this time. I could watch this one again and again. Thank you, Countryside Access, for coming up with a PSA that is charming and persuasive.

Tuesday Catblogging

2008-12-16T10:42:00.003Z

If you look at Greg's tail closely, you may find it forms a golden spiral.

London, 8 a.m.

2008-12-16T08:01:00.001Z

The sun is about to rise, or so they tell me.

-- Post From My iPhone

Another Neighbor

2008-12-11T10:48:00.002Z

John Bunyan is another resident of Bunhill Field, maybe 50 yards away from William Blake and Daniel Defoe.

-- Post From My iPhone

EDITIED: I know how to spell Daniel Defoe, but I can't always see what I'm writing on BlogPress.

Darkness On The Edge Of Town

2008-12-10T08:58:00.001Z

The city, or maybe the merchants, light your way home, at least for December.

-- Post From My iPhone

8 a.m. Dec. 9

2008-12-09T08:07:00.000Z

I don't see the sun yet.

-- Post From My iPhone

Who Made Steve Guttenberg A Star? We Did! We Did!

2008-12-07T16:37:00.001Z

Pantomime: One quarter comedy, one quarter vaudeville slapstick, one quarter rock opera, one quarter Christmas celebration, one quarter kid screamfest, and, uh, that's five quarters, but you get the idea. Throw in an out-of-work movie star, some minor TV celebrities, some West End actors, a children's dance troupe, some topical jokes for the parents, some silly jokes for the kids, and some audience participation. Sounds like a right mess, but it's fun. And they're still playing through January.

And in other panto news: Mickey Rooney's in one somewhere on this fair isle. I thought he was dead.

-- Post From My iPhone

Swiss catblogging

2008-12-06T17:06:00.002Z

Nala, who lives with our friends in Switzerland, gets snuggly with her stuffed chicken while it snows outside.

December Sunsetblogging

2008-12-03T09:35:00.005Z

The sun sets way too early.

That's better ...

... because it's better to light a single snowman than curse the darkness.

We're in that part of the year again, when the sun doesn't rise until after 8 and sets before 4. It's nice to see the merchants lighting up our streets during the dark months.

Still More Adventures In English As A Second Language

2008-11-25T10:59:00.004Z

During my church volunteer stint recently, I was chatting with the pastoral assistant (she does much more than that, including serving as the chief caretaker for Greg, but we'll just go with her title for now) about her duties as chaplain at a nearby Catholic girls' high school. She mentioned one of her duties was coordinating the school's "peer mentoring" program.

With her non-rhotic accent, however, I had a terrible time understanding what she was talking about. To my rhotic ears, I heard her saying one of two things initially: "pee mentoring" (a strange proposition, since most high schoolers ought to be potty trained) or "P.M. entering" (again, a strange proposition since most high schoolers are ready for all-day school).

On her third repetition, I finally understood what she was talking about.

An Extra Special Message From Steve Guttenberg

2008-11-14T14:06:00.004Z

And while we're at it ....

And in other panto news, Huggy Bear is doing a Snow White panto show in Catford.

EDITED: Hat tip to Mrs. W's colleague who pointed this out to us.

The Return Of Sky One

2008-11-13T20:13:00.002Z

Recessions tend to do amazing things. Even two egos as huge as Richard Branson and Rupert Murdoch can bury the hatchet when the economy turns south. This all is good news for the Werbenmanjensen household, which just finished 90 minutes of Simpsons watching thanks to the return of Sky One.

Now we've been getting by (*sigh*) with the reruns on Channel 4 (home of the Gay-O-Meter), but it just feels, I don't know, right, to see a Simpsons that's been aired in the United States in the last two weeks.

I feel whole again.

That's Pants

2008-11-13T10:16:00.003Z

Yes, a British English expression for something that's really bad, or your underwear. Annie Mole, as usual, has spotlighted the Pants Day, a version of the No Pants days on mass transit in several American cities. As Annie notes, going without "pants" in Britain can get you arrested, hence the name variation.

Friday Catblogging

2008-11-07T12:14:00.000Z

If you say "President Obama" in Greg's presence, he starts purring. It helps if you're petting him, however.

-- Post From My iPhone

A Sarasota Stockbroker Sums It Up

2008-11-05T02:50:00.002Z

In an interview with the BBC (natch): "I want a better America and a better world, and I'm willing to pay a little more in taxes for that. A new America is being born."

I couldn't have said it better myself. And this was a guy who voted for Bush in 2000.

Our long national nightmare is over

2008-11-05T02:28:00.003Z

BBC finally calls Ohio for Obama. GOPers in Virginia say it's not looking good for them there, and Florida isn't either.

The cava has been uncorked in the Werbenmanjensen household.

That Smell

2008-11-05T02:28:00.001Z

It smells like victory ... and cava.

-- Post From My iPhone

Ohio for Obama?

2008-11-05T02:10:00.001Z

Fox News calls the key state for Obama. Yes, I said Fox.

BBC commentator: "Remember, we haven't called it. ABC hasn't called it. Fox isn't good enough."

Hee hee.

Jesse Jackson on the Beeb

2008-11-05T01:45:00.002Z

Talking about how Barack is an agent of change. A different tone from these comments.

And I can't help but think of this when I hear him talk:

Quote of the moment

2008-11-05T01:22:00.002Z

"The fish rots from the head." -- Democratic strategist Jennifer Palmieri on BBC, when asked if Barack Obama ran his campaign like a "control freak." Her answer was ultimately no, because he couldn't have run a successful campaign that way.

The Big Potato

2008-11-05T00:58:00.001Z

This is how the lead BBC commentator just described the state of Pennsylvania and its significance to the election. Hmm.

Where Do Network Anchors Go When They Retire?

2008-11-04T23:26:00.000Z

Ted Koppel is on the BBC election coverage, along with Larry Sabato from UVa as the token Americans.

-- Post From My iPhone

Preview of tomorrow's London newspaper front pages

2008-11-04T23:01:00.003Z

The serious papers --
Guardian: America's Historic Verdict (photo of Obama voting)
Independent: The History Man (with Obama head shot)
Telegraph (I think): Obama takes his place in history
Times: History beckons as US goes to polls in record numbers
Daily Express (a paper that advertises that it's still only 40p): A New World Dawns
Financial Times: Some photo montage and opaque copy (nothing new there)

And the tabloids --
Daily Star: Yanks Very Much! (Next to scantily clad Abby Clancy "in thigh high boots")
Mirror: Gobama!
Sun (Britain's biggest circulation newspaper): Obarmy Army

And this gem, when talking with amazement about Americans waiting in line to vote: "This is a nation of fast food and low attention spans."

All courtesy of the Beeb.

From The Annals Of Silly Interviews

2008-11-04T22:57:00.000Z

Comes the BBC interview of Rupert Murdoch. He can't vote, and I think it's clear what he thinks.

-- Post From My iPhone

More from the Beeb

2008-11-04T22:55:00.003Z

They are showing a montage of highlights from the campaigns, and the soundtrack is Jump by the Pointer Sisters. A great song, IMHO, but couldn't we unearth something more recent than the Reagan administration?

At least they're not playing this.

BBC reports on U.S. election

2008-11-04T22:10:00.003Z

From the Chicago park where Obama's victory party will be, after interviewing people waiting in queues to get in: Well, I didn't write it down fast enough, but basically, it was something like, These people will be utterly devastated if change doesn't come.

From the McCain camp: "They're not confident, just hopeful."

Some Truths About Football

2008-11-04T09:40:00.002Z

Since I had an earlier cranky post about football, I couldn't help but be blown away by the accuracy of the best-ever cultural analysis about the relative popularity of "soccer football" in Britain and "American football" in America over at The Septic's Companion, formerly known as the English2American dictionary.

Go buy his book, or at least a beer for him. Without knowing it, he's been a great contributor to our blog. Go Web2.0!

Gonna Lay Down My Sword And Shield

2008-11-04T08:21:00.003Z

The United States has Veterans Day. Britain has Remembrance Day. Unlike the U.S. holiday, Remembrance Day is not a government holiday--everybody goes to work if it's a weekday. But it's in your face nonetheless in the form of plastic poppies growing like weeds on lapels and collars, purchased for the price of a chugger contribution to the Royal British Legion.

While watching football over the weekend, I noticed that no less than 100 percent of the studio commentators for one match were wearing plastic poppies. As an experiment, I just turned on BBC News 24 this moment, and both of the on-screen anchors were wearing plastic poppies. If you walk down a given city street this time of year, you will notice that at least half of the people you see are wearing the poppies. (The always clever Time Out London, in its "Lies To Tell Tourists" column a couple of years ago, urged Londoners to tell tourists that any person wearing a plastic poppy had actually killed a German in combat.)

But I won't.

I have the greatest respect for veterans and their sacrifices. I do like to know that people who come back from war with physical, psychological or emotional wounds are taken care of. I will give money to the cause. And I'm aware of the cultural significance of the Flandrian poppy in reference to the horror of World War I. But I won't wear the poppy. I guess I resent the overtones of it--the suggestion that if I don't wear the poppy I'm somehow disrespectful of veterans. And to me, the poppy remains a symbol of war, rather than the peace we should hope for. Give me a Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament peace symbol any day.

Friday Catblogging

2008-10-31T07:42:00.000Z

Restoring catblogging to the normal place in the rotation.

Whitecross (ish) Street cat went from the council housing to the skip across the street and back without making friends.

-- Post From My iPhone

We're Number 18! We're Number 18!

2008-10-30T15:04:00.002Z

Turns out our postcode is the 18th most-burgled in the UK.

Top that, Croydon!

Wenesday Catblogging

2008-10-28T16:09:00.001Z

This one goes out to the felinicidal commenter Badger:

Greg offers an opinion on Sherwood Anderson.

-- Post From My iPhone

Skyrockets In Flight

2008-10-28T08:42:00.003Z

I've begun to hear fireworks at night again, which can only mean that we're getting close to Guy Fawkes Day, aka Bonfire Night, the night England celebrates pyrotechnics, or maybe it was to commemorate the Gunpowder Plot, or maybe it was to commemorate the failure of the Gunpowder Plot. Anyway ... fireworks have been purchased, and I believe we're in the midst of the first school holiday of the year, which means aimless youth are wandering about at night setting off fireworks.

Still, the volume of fireworks is probably insufficient for this guy:

Mervyn To Smitty: Thanks Kid. Here's A Bag Of Money.

2008-10-25T13:15:00.005+01:00

The rapid devaluation of the pound to the dollar, and the fact that I'm paid largely in dollars, means that I've experienced a 25 percent raise in recent months. Thanks, Mervyn King!

Top Five Lies About Soccer, er, Football

2008-10-25T12:14:00.005+01:00

I love the beautiful game. I'll sit down and watch the British football equivalent of a Single-A baseball game if it's on, just because. But there are some things that you'll hear about the game that are just not true.

1. English people never call it soccer. This is just a flat-out lie. On Britain's leading sports channel, I just finished watching a show called "Soccer AM." I am now watching a show called "Soccer Saturday." English people can stuff it if they sneer at me for call it soccer. Get your story straight. It's either "football" always, or it's not.

2. Soccer is a non-contact sport. This is a lie that many American soccerphiles will tell you to promote the sport among kids. Hossam Ghaly's teeth will disagree. So will Petr Cech's head.

3. Soccer players run the whole game. Yeah, if they're 5 years old and the game is aimed at getting kids tired out so they'll take a nap on a Saturday afternoon. When players are substituted in certain matches, Britain's leading sports channel likes to pop up with a figure of how much the substituted player has run in that match. I've seen figures as high as 15 kilometers. Memo to Sky Sports: 15 kilometers is 37 and a half laps of the stadium. I'm not buying it, especially when I see guys in the 78th minute doing a lot of standing, walking and slow jogging.

4. There's no more hooliganism in soccer. German authorities might disagree. So might the Manchester police. Football fans have to be separated. Rugby fans don't. 'Nuff said.

5. Soccer songs and chants are sporty and inspirational. I'll let you be the judge of that. It appears that Atletico Madrid fans agree with me.

The Further Continuing Adventures Of English As A Second Language

2008-10-24T10:58:00.001+01:00

Crimbo.

Saying "Merry Crimbo" just doesn't sound right.

Boris Speaks ....

2008-10-23T12:04:00.003+01:00

.... to the people who voted for him.

ADDED: Most Bromleyans (or whatever you call them) would probably prefer to be governed by Kent. How far is it from City Hall again?

View Larger Map

Whitecross Street Catblogging

2008-10-22T15:10:00.000+01:00

Don't know if this cat is asking to be let in or simply basking.

-- Post From My iPhone

A Palace Boudoir

2008-10-21T18:24:00.002+01:00

Smitty and I are thinking of redecorating our bedroom a la the Reggia di Caserta. Just need to get the ceilings a tad higher...

A Scene from Hampton Court Palace

2008-10-21T18:19:00.001+01:00

Some days, I just feel so exposed, don't you?

The Chrysalis Cracks. A Londoner Emerges.

2008-10-20T11:21:00.003+01:00

My palate is far too relaxed and my diphthongs too chewy to ever speak British English. I choke at the thought of pledging allegiance to a royal. When "God Save The Queen" plays, I hear "My Country 'Tis Of Thee." But I can feel like a Londoner nonetheless--because I can now navigate Soho's twisty passages and narrow streets without a copy of London A-Z.

The more astute of you may note, based on taglines from recent posts, that I could easily use the map function my iPhone. Yes, I could, which makes it easy to leave the A-Z behind. But twice this past weekend I found my way around Soho quite easily without ever having to check a map.

This is a major accomplishment for me.

Whitecross Street Mural--Artist Found!

2008-10-17T11:51:00.000+01:00

I finally saw the mysterious artist working on the Whitecross Street mural. He went by Bird and had a baby with him as he painted.

-- Post From My iPhone

Hello, autumn

2008-10-15T15:10:00.000+01:00

Some weird, blowy showers have been passing through the last couple of days.

-- Post From My iPhone

The Last Conceit Of Unfettered Capitalism ...

2008-10-15T12:52:00.000+01:00

... or, The Losing Side Renegotiates Surrender Terms

-- Post From My iPhone

Tuesday Catblogging

2008-10-14T16:21:00.001+01:00

Greg nicked my seat when I stood up for a second.

-- Post From My iPhone

I'm From The Government, And I'm Here To Help

2008-10-13T09:47:00.003+01:00

Yesterday, as we were coming back through immigration, the gentleman reviewing our passports looked at the number of stamps we have and suggested, in a helpful way, that we register for the Home Office's IRIS Program--a biometric program to protect borders and keep us safe from terrorism, while of course guarding our confidentiality.

We know that the UK government has a sterling record on protecting personal data:

Personal data on every child in the country and national insurance numbers and bank account details of parents and carers claiming child benefit have gone missing after the government sent two password-protected CDs through the post.

And UK governments have never misused anti-terror powers before, have they?

Thousands of middle managers in local councils are being authorised to spy on people suspected of petty offences using powers designed to prevent crime and terrorism.
Even junior council officials are being allowed to initiate surveillance operations in what privacy campaigners likened to Eastern bloc police tactics.
The Home Office is expected to be urged by the Commons Home Affairs select committee to issue guidelines to councils on the type of operations in which surveillance can be used.
Amid increasing concern in Parliament that the UK is slowly becoming a surveillance society, the committee has looked at the operation of the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act (Ripa), which some MPs say is being misused to focus on petty crime rather than serious offending.

And of course, the UK government itself has never used anti-terror powers to resolve a contract dispute, have they?

Iceland's authorities last night appeared close to agreeing a repayment package to help cover the losses of British savers with deposits in Icesave, the UK operation of one of the country's stricken banks.
Officials from the Treasury, Bank of England and FSA flew back from Reykjavik yesterday having made "significant progress" in talks with banks and government officials aimed at securing a rapid payout for British depositors.
However, the deal does not yet include the billions of pounds invested by councils, charities and other public bodies.
The Icelandic government took control of three of the country's largest banks last week and froze deposits, including an estimated £4.5bn from British savers.
The UK government has used anti-terror laws to seize an estimated £4bn in Icelandic resources, and ministers said yesterday these will not be released until a deal has been struck.

We of course politely told the immigration drone we'd think about it, but I think I'll view standing in queues as a minor inconvenience compared to the major inconvenience of losing my personal freedom.

Pompei, Casa Dei Vetti

2008-10-10T14:41:00.003+01:00

Yup, that's what you think it is. (It's Priapus, the god of fertility. No surprise there.)

-- Post From My iPhone

Pompei, The Victims

2008-10-10T14:41:00.001+01:00

Plaster casts taken from the landslide.

-- Post From My iPhone

Pompei, Anfiteatro

2008-10-10T14:39:00.001+01:00

That rumbling sound means we haven't killed enough Christians today. (Contestants entered one gate. The dead and injured left through the other.)

-- Post From My iPhone

Pompei, Teatro Piccolo

2008-10-10T14:33:00.001+01:00

That rumbling sound means Ovid's experimental works have offended the gods.

-- Post From My iPhone

Pompei, Teatro Grande

2008-10-10T14:08:00.003+01:00

The rumbling sound is a sign that Ovid In The Park must go on!

-- Post From My iPhone

Pompei, Forum

2008-10-10T14:08:00.001+01:00

No, seriously, I hear a rumbling sound. Maybe we should ask the priests. (Yes, that's Vesuvius in the background. Draw an imaginary triangle from the outside of the two masses there. The top is the peak of Vesuvius before it blew.)

-- Post From My iPhone

Pompei, Temple of Apollo

2008-10-10T14:07:00.001+01:00

Do you hear a rumbling sound? Eh, it's probably nothing.

-- Post From My iPhone

Amalfi Catblogging

2008-10-09T13:53:00.001+01:00

Italian cat wants to be friends, but liked the water in the street even more.

-- Post From My iPhone

Ciao, Amalfi

2008-10-09T11:19:00.001+01:00

The towns on the Amalfi Coast cling to the sides of mountains. You get the feeling nothing much changes here--except, you know, for all us tourists.

-- Post From My iPhone

Sea, City, Mountain, Sky

2008-10-07T16:37:00.001+01:00

The view from our balcony. The person who booked this room did a fantastic job (it wasn't me).

-- Post From My iPhone

St. Peter's Dome

2008-10-06T17:14:00.003+01:00

At the end of our street, we get this view.

-- Post From My iPhone

Church of Jesu

2008-10-06T17:14:00.001+01:00

This is the ceiling.

-- Post From My iPhone

Monument to Victor Emmanuele II

2008-10-06T17:13:00.003+01:00

Considered an eyesore to some, this monument to the Risorgimento movement became known as "Mussolini's Typewriter" because his blackshirts paraded on the steps as he addressed the populace from the square opposite.

-- Post From My iPhone

Pantheon

2008-10-06T17:13:00.001+01:00

The hole in the roof of this temple-cum-church provides all of the lighting. This is a hole, not a skylight, so you might want to avoid it during the rainy season.

-- Post From My iPhone

Pantheon

2008-10-06T16:09:00.001+01:00

The hole in the roof of this temple-cum-church provides all of the lighting. This is a hole, not a skylight, so you might want to avoid it during the rainy season.

-- Post From My iPhone

Church of St. Cosmas and St. Damian

2008-10-06T16:07:00.001+01:00

This fifth century mosaic shows Peter and Paul introducing the two saints to Jesus.

-- Post From My iPhone

The Forum

2008-10-06T16:04:00.001+01:00

The main bit of the old Roman city: The place where they got on with the business of an empire.

-- Post From My iPhone

Largo Argentina

2008-10-06T10:18:00.001+01:00

Four temples of unclear use. Under the street, behind the six columns, is the site of Julius Caesar's assassination.

-- Post From My iPhone

The Spanish Steps

2008-10-05T17:24:00.001+01:00

-- Post From My iPhone

Top O' The Spanish Steps

2008-10-05T17:14:00.001+01:00

-- Post From My iPhone

The Main Altar

2008-10-05T12:03:00.001+01:00

With a better look at the rose window that looks like a wafer. There's a peace dove in the window. We heard mass I'm front of this one. Didn't understand a word, other than "pace" and a few other ones from Latin, but we're well-drilled Catholics and knew what to do.

-- Post From My iPhone

I Like This One Because

2008-10-05T08:20:00.001+01:00

I wonder how many babies the painter had to throw to make the floating cherubim look so realistic.

-- Post From My iPhone

Name That Painting, Part 2

2008-10-05T08:19:00.003+01:00

Again, another wonderful entry from the Vatican Museums, but my memory is faulty.

-- Post From My iPhone

Name That Painting

2008-10-05T08:19:00.001+01:00

Honestly, we saw a lot today, and our tour guide said it was an important milestone in art history, but I'll be damned if I can remember.

-- Post From My iPhone

Altar, St. Peter's

2008-10-05T08:18:00.001+01:00

The high altar is monstrous enough, but if you look past the altar, to the white rose window in the background: it looks like a communion wafer, and the gold around it looks like a monstrance, the stand used to hold communion wafer during exhibition of the blessed sacrament.

-- Post From My iPhone

The Transfiguration

2008-10-05T07:57:00.001+01:00

Rafael's last work.

Pieta

2008-10-04T15:23:00.001+01:00

The most famous sculpture in the world. This is the real one, not that fake Pieta that almost got me fired.
-- Post From My iPhone

St. Peter's Square

2008-10-04T15:21:00.001+01:00

-- Post From My iPhone

Dear British Airport Authority

2008-10-04T05:41:00.001+01:00

Once a customer has arrived at an airport it should never--never!--require a £20 taxi ride to move from one terminal to another. Only an idiot would design an airport otherwise.

-- Post From My iPhone

Yo! Yotel!

2008-10-03T22:02:00.001+01:00

There's not much more space in a Yotel room than what you see in this photo: Enough space for a bed, with a small bathroom (behind the shade on the left side of the photo). Small, efficient, cute: The epitome of Japanese design. This particular space is a premium room at the Heathrow Yotel. The idea is to give tired travelers a place to nap for a few hours or, as in our case, a place for people with veerrry early flights a place to sleep that requires little early morning transport. Brought to you by the same people who run Yo! Sushi, eveybody's favorite conveyer-belt Japanese joint.

-- Post From My iPhone

Rotten Butter

2008-10-03T17:06:00.004+01:00

Your eyes don't deceive you: That is John "Johnny Rotten" Lydon, the onetime frontman for the Sex Pistols, doing adverts for butter.

It's probably important to note that Johnny earned his "Rotten" moniker in the '70s because of his personal hygiene.

Oh, wait, here's a video!

(Johnny Rotten and Morris dancers? Heavens!)

That's OK, though: The folks from Madness are also doing food advertisements:

It's no "Baggy Trousers":

Whitecross Street Thursday

2008-10-02T12:46:00.001+01:00

-- Post From My iPhone

I Predict A Riot

2008-10-02T08:31:00.002+01:00

I've written before of our ubiquitous bookies in the UK. You may know that they'll offer a wager on almost anything: Sporting events, elections, natural disasters. Perhaps it's an outgrowth of the kind of behavior that goes on at the Lloyd's of London insurance market, with less sophisticated financial instruments (e.g. you're the guy holding the bag if you lose your gamble, instead of your reinsurer). Mrs. Werbenmanjensen has emailed this morning to tell me that one of our fine bookies, Paddy Power, is offering odds on riots in several international cities related to economic turmoil.

New York, at 9-4, and Washington, at 10-3, are suckers' bets, in my opinion. The terms of the wager are that "riots must be confirmed by that countries ruling government as being due to motivated by economic circumstances." The Bush administration would just call them looters. It's happened before, after all. My money would be on Paris, at 3-1. But I'd also like to know where the Kaiser Chiefs are putting their money:

Rush Hour, London Bridge

2008-10-01T09:12:00.001+01:00

-- Post From My iPhone

St. John's Gate

2008-09-29T14:45:00.001+01:00

This may be London's last standing model of a medieval city gate. Wikipedia tells us it protected the priory of the Knights of St. John, aka the Knights Hospitalers. (The vestiges of these crusading monk-knights are seen today in the St. John Ambulance, headquartered by the gate.) One look at this gate and one gets the sense of how hard it would have been, with the war-fighting technology of the time, to attack a fortified city--a suicide mission for so many soldiers.

-- Post From My iPhone

The Pearly Kings

2008-09-28T22:09:00.001+01:00

This is something I've been meaning to write about for some time. The Pearly Kings (and Queens) are a tradition that's so London it hurts. Its origins are with the Cockneys, and as you can see the gent above has as his kingdom the area within earshot of the Bow bells, making him the cockniest of Cockneys. Now a charitable society, the Pearly King originated among the street vendors of London's East End. I'll recommend you go to the Wikipedia entry on the Pearly Kings and Queens if you want to read more about their origins. I can't link from here since I'm writing remotely.

-- Post From My iPhone

Stay Tuned For This Party Political Ad

2008-09-26T09:46:00.002+01:00

Or not. Annie Mole is hot on the trail of a Tube ad campaign featuring Barack Obama's image that nobody is quite sure about.

That Speech Went Well, Didn't It

2008-09-25T17:34:00.001+01:00

Mrs. Werbenmanjensen adds the following quote from the Financial Times:

"New Labour without Tony Blair is like Genesis without Peter Gabriel."

(Has little to do with a certain speech last night, I know.)

-- Post From My iPhone

Wednesday Moonblogging

2008-09-24T10:56:00.004+01:00

Inner-city vistas. From a couple of weeks ago.

(Note: Blogger's not letting me upload larger photos.)

That's The Way It Was And We Liked It! We Loved It!

2008-09-22T10:39:00.003+01:00

I'm looking at some recent posts and realizing I've come across as rather cranky. (Examples: here, here, and here.) It doesn't really sell a blog to come off as shrill, does it? (Oh, wait, maybe it does.) Others have noticed it, too. Mrs. Werbenmanjensen says, "You hate everything." Friends who have noticed this post here and on Facebook have commented on it. Some have correctly wondered if turning 40 has affected me. (Did I forget to mention that I turned 40 on the blog? What an omission!). I'm willing to consider this as a possible explanation. But anyway ... over the weekend Mrs. W and I went to visit the lovely beach town of Brighton, also known as "London-by-the-Sea," and I pledged to become a new person, more loving and life-affirming in my words and deeds. So I will have to say no to cranky posts in the future as much as possible.

Unless it involves banks.

Familiarity Breeds Contempt, Part 2

2008-09-20T09:05:00.000+01:00

Forgot to mention:

Don't get all snarky if I refer to the game you call "football" as "soccer." You also call it "soccer." I am now watching a TV show on a sports channel called "Soccer a.m."

Things I Miss

2008-09-19T14:41:00.000+01:00

The word dude.

Yes, the multi-expressive dude.

Familiarity Breeds Contempt

2008-09-19T11:32:00.001+01:00

I know that's the adage, and it's true in my case, at least lately. I've been struggling on occasion in my relations with British people, and it's an attitude problem. I think it's that I've wearied a bit with the "first and best" attitude held by some when it comes to their contact with Americans.

I can trace my attitude change to an incident at a party held by a colleague of Mrs. Werbenmanjensen a month or so ago, when I was about to get the "why-do-you-call-it-the-World-Series-when-it's-only-teams-from-America?" lecture, as if this had never occurred to me nor had anybody ever mentioned it to me. I finally had to ask him if an English cricketer would rather win the World Cup, a contest among all the cricketing nations of the world, or The Ashes, a contest with just one other country (PS: It's The Ashes). He didn't think that a fair comparison, but he did point out in the same vein that the Six Nations is technically only a contest between four nations.

This conversation was the first of several incidents I've found at least a little irritating lately. Perhaps the whole thing was accelerated during the Olympics period when the British press was picking a fight over medal tallies. (No, it wasn't just so Americans look good this Olympiad. We've always done it that way. It's you who choose to denigrate silver and bronze by failing to count them.)

So to any native who might be reading this: I've lived here two and a half years. So please understand:

1. The "British" Open was the first of the major golf championships in the world and should therefore be called "the Open Championship." I know this, so please don't lecture me about it.
1a. No, really, Americans don't take the Ryder Cup that seriously, no matter how much you try to convince yourself otherwise. Golf ain't a team sport.
2. There are various claims about inventions attributed to Americans that may have been British. History is written by the winners.
2a. We could get into a long debate about who exactly invented the first computer. Suffice it to say: IBM and Apple are not British companies.
2b. You are way ahead of the US when it comes to broadband, digital television innovation and mobile phones. I said it. Leave me alone.
3. You spell honor with a "u", check with a "que" and summarize with an "s". I work for Americans. Therefore it would cause some difficulty if I got in the practise of spelling like you.
4. (Courtesy of Mrs. W) When I say things like "VY-ta-min D" there's no point in you saying back to me "VIT-a-min D." I know we pronounce it differently. I'm not going to change, and neither are you.
5. I'm not saying things like "brilliant" and "bugger all" to make fun of you. It's things I've actually picked up.
6. "High-fives" are not something British people do or are that comfortable with. But I'm going to do them when I'm excited anyway.

Talk Like A Pirate Day!

2008-09-19T09:31:00.006+01:00

Aye, it's Capn Smitty here to remind ye it's Talk Like A Pirate Day, which be a holiday in the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Celebrate or I'll keelhaul ye! Ye mateys can start by singing this shanty.

A Letter From Steve Guttenberg

2008-09-17T18:51:00.003+01:00

Hello Friends,

Here I am trying on my pantomime costume, whilst making the most of the LA sunshine, before I pack my bags and head for Bromley this Christmas. I'm over the moon about making my UK pantomime debut as Baron Hard-up in the magical Cindarella.

Working with rogues during my Police Academy days should, I hope, be a fine workout for my battles with the Ugly Sisters; but I'm sure I can count on your help to boo them off! The song and dance routines will be awesome--something I'm really going to enjoy after taking part on America's top-rated show Dancing With The Stars. I am also delighted to announce that the Absolutely Fabulous Helen Lederer will be joining me as Fairy Godmother to add a sprinkling of comedy magic to the fun.

It's going to be a truly wonderful Chrismas for me in the UK, so make sure you join me for the biggest and funniest traditional pantomime around and book your ticket today.

See you soon!

Steve

Because you want to: Who holds back the elec-tric car? Who made Steve Guttenberg a star?

(Hat tip to Annie Mole, whose Twitter feed alerted me to this show.)

Now, This

2008-09-04T07:01:00.003+01:00

Like George W. Bush and the presidency, I spend more time breaking from blogging than actually blogging. But it's true: I can't blog for a few days. I will update the twitter feed frequently (right sidebar, underneath the links). But before I go, I hear from Annie Mole that Boris is announcing Tube fare increases today. Otherwise, go read a brother blog like Kevboy's realm.

And for your enjoyment, to celebrate the start of football season:

D'oh!

2008-09-03T17:50:00.001+01:00

Squatters overpower Army base? Well, not really:

AN army of squatters encamped on a military housing estate has escaped eviction after an embarrassing legal blunder by the Ministry of Defence (MoD).

The mistake means residents in nearby upmarket homes could be subjected to weeks of noise, late-night parties, and disruption to their daily lives.

The squatters moved in last week to the barracks in William Gardens, Putney, after some 300 of them were kicked out of a previous squat in Balham, south London.

Officials attempted to evict them out by obtaining a court order yesterday but a blunder meant they went to the wrong court, letting the squatters off the hook.

MoD lawyers brought the case before a judge at West London County Court in Hammersmith. But the judge immediately threw it out, saying they should have gone to Wandsworth County Court in Putney, less than a mile from the occupied flats.

It could take now take weeks for the case against the 50 or so remaining squatters to be heard again.